Following up on my previous post, here is a list of some professional advice I received as an assistant professor:
- Wear nicer shoes.
- Stop being flighty. Work on the same thing for about 20 years in order to become famous as “the person who does that.”
- Be at least gold medallion or equivalent on some airline.
- Screw up a service assignment in a very public way early on, in order to avoid being given important assignments.
- Have a cleaner office.
- Start out getting poor teaching evaluations so there’ll be room for improvement.
- Work harder on managing my image.
- At any cost, graduate a PhD student before going up for tenure.
Each of these was, I believe, intended seriously.